Today was the 100th anniversary of Bay to Breakers. It is an event where people run/walk from the San Francisco Bay to the Pacific Ocean. It is hosted by zazzle and is a legitimate race for many dedicated runners. However, for tens of thousands of others, it is just another excuse to dress up, get shitfaced, and act like idiots in public. Oh, and did I forget to mention the rampant nudity throughout the race too. Yeah, there is plenty of that as well.
Ali and I woke up around 9:30 a.m. to check out this San Francisco "tradition." We figured we would catch the tail end of the festivities, but we were mistaken. We weren't quite sure what to expect once we got to the race barrier but had a pretty good idea as we were walking towards the Panhandle. We passed quite a few drunks and people dressed up in various costumes. As we got closer to the park, more and more stumbling folks started to blanket our section of Masonic Avenue. Many were shuffling around like a horde of zombies, whereas others were just outright belligerent, screaming at the top of their lungs. We finally arrived at the barrier and were blown away by what we saw. (Photos at the bottom.)
For over an hour, a constant stream of people came strolling down Fell. About 95% of those participating were dressed up in some type of costume. It was almost like a spring version of Halloween. Some participants were quite creative, and others were just downright scary. As I said before, there were clearly people who decided that their birthday suit was enough to wear today. I wish they thought differently this morning. I was blinded numerous times by body parts that I did not want to see. Black Swan was also quite the popular costume for walkers, and this was amongst the men and women. I am also pretty sure that I saw more spandex today than there ever was in the entire 1980's. Unfortunately, many of the people wearing it should not have been. I mean why would you want to go 7.5 miles with a leotard crammed firmly up your ass? That goes for men and women. Not to mention the amount of camel toe that was on display for the short amount of time I was observing the madness. Plus there were some women walking the course in heels. Not only are you intoxicated, but a 12k in heels. Come on now. Just not smart.
There definitely were some creative costumes. One which being the Oregon Trail. We even got to watch them circle the wagons. I found Waldo lots of times as well. Angry Birds attacked some evil pigs. A Human Car Wash was another interesting concept. We saw some giant decorated boobs, lots of painted faces, and numerous other creations.
If I had to guess, I would say around 80% of the people walking had consumed some type of alcohol before and/or during their walk. The police in our area alone confiscated tons of booze. I would say they dumped about 4 30-packs, at least a box of wine, and probably 6 fifths of hard liquor. Quite honestly, I wished that the cops would let those drinking booze alone and do something about the nudists walking the course.
Unfortunately, white people and lots of booze does not always mix. There were a few times that my residence life background started to kick in. A young man dressed up as Santa Claus was unable to walk under his own accord and was struggling even when two friends were trying to help carry him. He needed medical attention immediately as he seemed to be in the .25-.30 BAC range. He was not the only one at this point, as I saw quite a few people wipe out in my hour of observing. I am surprised that more people are not hurt/injured/hospitalized from this event. As of writing this, the only real injury reported was some one breaking their shin jumping the barrier. I can only imagine the aftermath tomorrow. This is definitely not a day that I would want to be a SFPD officer.
In all, I need to repeat the title of this post, WHITE PEOPLE ARE FUCKING CRAZY!! Not everyone participating was white, but this is one of those events, that only could be concocted by crazy ass white people. Who else would combine a 12k with tons of booze, costumes, and debauchery?
Until next time...
-Sipes
